Tag Archives: Ben Pink

All-Time Favorite Foods

Dudes, I am seriously huge. Check out them titties. You know you like them. Glowing orbs of hot man flabber. Don’t stand too close, unless you want to have an orgasm. Shit, crowds of people part like the Red Sea when I pass. I am a fucking stallion when it comes to eating stuff. Shit, a Big Gulp is like a Baby Splash for me. My urine tastes like Cheetos.... more

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Boys Eating Popsicles

Before we kick this party off, let’s make something clear right from the start. Yeah, you wish you were me. Got it. No need to remind me. You know how I know that? Because my brother rocks packed restaurants full of hot new mom action. He’s also TOTALLY INTO LITTLE BOYS,  which leaves all that fishwrap for me and me alone. What do you think that smell is, it sure... more

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In what can only be described as a STUNNING COINCIDENCE, Ben Pink no longer owes me money. Shortly after I ran the original article Ben Pink OWES ME MONEY, the man himself got in touch with me. “I will be at the gallery Thursday, and will have a check for you then.” Give it a minute to sink in… Ben Pink… the same guy I told you was harder to... more

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Welcome: That Not Nice!

[robot: today after an advertisement for our fledgling little publication was posted on craigslist, some people took time out of their busy days to visit our website and posted their reactions back on craigslist. apparently they were unaware that they can say whatever they want here. anyhow, we sent our resident craigslist correspondent, Baby, out to investigate the matter further.] POST #1: Re: Portland Art Exposed “New online magazine created... more

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Now I’m not one to point the finger, but Ben Pink (aka Ben Pinkowitz), of Portland’s Launchpad Gallery, is a cheap ass dodgy bastard when it comes to paying for artwork. Not only will he try to pay you as little as possible (since he’s a starving gallery owner), but when he does pay you, it will never be the entire amount. He’ll just give you whatever loose bill happens... more

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